Psychology Humor: Daily experiences in Psych Jargon

Impress people with psychobabble using these phrases

By Aditya Shukla, Psychologist, Cognition Today Chat Box

Don't say...

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Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-a443fa1c-7058-4df7-a955-f82fe92481c8","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-43e6414e-ecb7-4d3e-ab71-cc327fb788a7","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-0bf6cc05-06a9-48f6-ac34-94db81af6a5c","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9a9a3d20-fd6c-4e5c-be66-2f9af3b335d5","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-acac4eff-9bef-4677-a23f-96be4b3a9270","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-6d1105f1-4a67-4a90-beca-9fc2b0600e12","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 2 Looks matter first appeal to our visual precedence Learn more

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-c1447ac2-f2e3-416b-a5b8-8fc94ba7bd81","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9335fd58-42f4-41a4-9675-dbd111cdfe0e","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-5656f350-4005-4c16-bc3f-dab706e61d36","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-7ea2ab7b-88b0-454c-bf54-6da6de94f5b5","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-43ddfc57-2a7c-4c5d-b52f-72bf5a53b311","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-d76f0834-a836-456f-9ced-c2d3872b6ebc","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 3 This is mentally exhausting The cognitive load is high Learn more

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-0721a3d8-76d6-4d68-b9c4-79419df901ae","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-dc6d257c-f8ac-44b0-95a9-1232a7f0e8d6","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-3028a0f5-d5cd-4b12-8d81-660997396ac4","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-dbfc0394-d11c-4505-9a5a-40d51a4b0607","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-1903e14c-9e01-4ccc-9971-f4c5ef107fbe","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-90433805-3aa0-486e-9422-d13b5e173843","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 4 Stop doing that! Inhibit your response

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-d2daaa8c-a0a1-4df5-b453-2faedb2f93b9","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-324bdce1-dbf6-4a3e-a56d-d0213fdd9b6d","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-5fbe059d-621e-4b3a-9277-933e492149ac","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-84bba87b-3ca9-436d-90bc-900efa8e9804","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-2c13d2c1-1c99-464c-8f74-e2f756838416","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-b6f77a89-e16a-45ec-8449-709f37ae4978","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 5 I can't focus Too many stimuli are competing for my attention

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-f6bb9e0e-e0f0-4102-87c2-2f7ddc9477d8","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-eee3d87a-43d3-4ee4-b812-cd5569e89873","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-580deb46-a586-4055-90cc-6b633d80516a","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-ef3f3a1a-5900-44d7-8a0d-b63caa68c6e4","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-b32acb8a-f65a-426d-905b-878e7d8b8a35","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-fd267795-c251-47ea-aaa2-068b4cf0ad75","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 6 I have a gut feeling Heuristics are guiding my decision-making

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-b49c2a89-27df-4129-b127-961c8a88edd4","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-b178f1a7-9e48-43f1-85a3-2c6149b54c3e","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-49725fdc-c7e2-4134-b36f-6b678e1de705","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9ff74bb5-2884-4b2c-8603-9fdc3f3d32ea","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-f0d2708f-0f7f-4e25-ba77-f02bf713adfa","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-91437850-14ea-4648-af40-bc0e51165def","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 7 Your thoughts aren't logical I'm spotting cognitive distortions Learn more

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-c79d91e5-d804-4a43-abae-0d0cf553714b","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9eec1519-f735-472a-a827-c4633a8aff86","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-f075adc0-9978-4490-9a7e-d5bf43fbe28c","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9b75d62d-5524-46a7-87f9-df32ff2609b5","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-95665d51-6f21-4d40-beea-c4a3f2e91696","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-0d4737bc-fef1-4c63-a6ae-9460ad06833a","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 8 I'm in a bad mood I'm exhibiting negative affect

Don't say...

[{"selector":"#anim-ca667523-6f3a-456c-8148-baf41471fc5c","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-bee1309b-92ae-431d-a8ad-6f053ba5a2a4","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-499.99991%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-f4671af4-e407-4f52-a6bd-b6ba31e2e60c","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-386677c8-6814-4433-aa4a-3c6e1814670e","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-9f4a1131-ff59-47c7-95b4-6c4343fc38a6","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-2957e2d4-6615-4fc8-8ae7-aefe0551ad45","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 9 I'm just thinking about life I'm engaged in existential metacognition Learn more

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[{"selector":"#anim-eeddeb17-4ac5-43b1-98d1-d456e749496d","keyframes":{"opacity":[0,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-83415f11-bd42-4ce3-9bf5-ccfa575771eb","keyframes":{"transform":["translate3d(-183.23352%, 0px, 0)","translate3d(0px, 0px, 0)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1600,"easing":"cubic-bezier(0.2, 0.6, 0.0, 1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-5892146a-ad1d-4f4b-b4b0-071568bf43a8","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-c3059f15-2ea3-448a-b6e3-9f0a3392fad5","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] [{"selector":"#anim-48ecf9bd-d7bb-434c-a7d5-d3d59df2b5e4","keyframes":{"opacity":[1,1]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"both"}] [{"selector":"#anim-40d7ac13-45f4-40ca-a739-c58d9d5adffa","keyframes":{"transform":["scale(3)","scale(1)"]},"delay":0,"duration":1000,"easing":"cubic-bezier(.3,0,.55,1)","fill":"forwards"}] 10 I'm easily overwhelmed My sensory processing sensitivity is high Learn more

Impress people with psychobabble using these phrases

Technically not wrong!!

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